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I’m normal I swear

This is the funniest plot twist ever

okay but the funniest lovebug AU would be one where literally nothing changes about the narrator’s behavior because he’s already a) such a little weirdo and b) obsessed with stanley to the point where it’s genuinely concerning.

“it makes the narrator only have thoughts about stanley” oh, you mean the only person he ever thinks about? try again.

“it makes him weirdly possessive in a way that only someone in love would get” I’m sorry, did you not see him add a bucket to the game for stanley only to spend the rest of the update trying to get rid of it? I thought so.

“it would make him act uncharacteristically silly instead of being so uptight all the time” yeah? I guess the silly birds ending never happened huh. the elevator bossa nova and the five clicks on door 430 achievement dialogue were just figments of my imagination. he TALKS for the bucket.

anyway. I will die on this hill

there is a difference between characters who are divorced and characters with a strained marriage. for example:

chell and glados are divorced

the narrator and stanley have a strained marriage

i expect corrections posthaste

I think the best ship dynamic is two characters who are 5 times divorced minimum

god created man to be penetrated

i posted this with violence and the crucifixion in mind and you hussies are talking about anal

me when i lie

Just a small tantrum

you know, it makes more sense to me to visualize the drakes as actually being a fairly physically affectionate family (whenever they were home at least)

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